Wasps and Men

Well, my daughter Teddi (http://teddiandjerryclayton.blogspot.com/) shamed me into posting today. “It’s been a week” she said. And I thought...well, it doesn’t matter what I thought.

Anyway, as I was pulling weeds in my garden today, I realized that golf isn’t the best metaphor for life or for growth and development. Despite all the books on that topic. Of course, my golfer friends probably wouldn’t agree with me. I think gardening is the best metaphor. It occurred to me today, while on my knees in the heat of the north Texas sun, and my arms stretched out to reach those pesky weeds that are right in the middle of the garden, that gardening is an act of community.

We aren’t out there by or for ourselves. The diversity in the garden (or at least in mine) is staggering. Because it isn’t just the flora, it’s also the fauna in the garden. So, gardening is about my relationship to ‘other’ (whatever ‘other’ may be). And all the ways I relate to ‘other’, and what I think about myself and who I am. (And getting laid-off from one’s job gives lots more room in one’s head for musings such as these).

I notice that I’m angry about the yellow leaf disease my roses just keep getting no matter what I do. And, I’m a little afraid to pick some of the weeds - what if they’re flowers and I’m just not recognizing them?...I’ve got to pay attention while I’m doing anything in the garden so I don’t get bit by something I didn’t see,

like a spider, a wasp, a red ant or even stung by a scorpion,

or poked by a plant with poking apparatus. And, each plant, each section of the garden needs something different. While they all need weeding, and most need their regular hair trims, some also need more talking to and more love than the others. Some need to have no debris at the base, while others thrive with the mess under them. Some need 6 hours of sun and others only want 2-3 hours. Which is just exactly like any community. So, while gardening, I got to examine my relationship to community - each aspect of it. Where I want to quit and where I want to play and where it occurs like hard work and which parts I’ll neglect...And, getting present to my love for nurturing community...

Which brings me to wasps and men. Well, not really, but I’m gonna segue anyway. Today, I realized that both are attracted to provocative clothing. Of course, provocative means different things to different creatures - but it is provocative nonetheless.

For wasps, the provocative clothing seems to be this brightly colored visor. I was constantly swatting away the unwanted attention of the giant yellow-jacket wasps when I was wearing it.

After an annoying amount of attention (although flattering at first, it does get old), I changed hats. This was my second pick. Absolutely not one wasp came near me after the switch. I’ve noticed this same behavior with men....